Concerning
BBQ Ego Deflation Kit
He's narrating the bark to a captive audience. Give the audience a comment box, a clipboard, and a scoring category called HUMILITY.
Supply Kits
Annoying
Birthday Overreaction Kit
A minor birthday, honored with a full-shoulder sash, a heavy medal, and a motorcade of one car reading MOTORCADE.
Concerning
The Single-Object Installation Kit
Take one worthless object from her house, mount it in a glass case, light it from below, and hand her the docent duties.
Concerning
Friendship Intervention Kit
Turn her dining room into a venue with an agenda, name tents at every seat, and one centered box of tissues nobody will need.
Concerning
Houseguest Deterrent Kit
They were supposed to visit. It's been eleven days. Provision the guest room with real hospitality, delivered at a pressure the body notices.
Annoying
Passive-Aggressive Office Kit
Beige, desk-legal supplies for documenting a coworker so thoroughly that confrontation becomes unnecessary.
Concerning
Rubber Duck Escalation Pack
You're mailing your friend a rubber duck a day for a month, each one harder to explain than the last. This is every duck the month needs, plus margin for the post office.
Annoying
Tiny Gift / Huge Box Kit
He asked for a gift card. He's getting it under an appliance box, a run of nested boxes, and enough packing peanuts to find in spring.